Is fear motivating?

Generations ago, women leaders had to instill fear in order to gain respect, but that method has long ago faded away. Today, I still encounter teachers, coaches, and sometimes parents, who feel the only way to get their point across is to be feared. Why is that?

I’ve come across coaches who bully their players with downright derogatory methods and negativity like nothing I’ve seen before. “You’re such a disappointment”, “You suck. Just flat out suck”, “You don’t look fit”, “Why are you even here?” Then those coaches brag to other coaches about how mean they are to their players. Could this treatment actually spur the best performance possible from their players? Does it work?

I honestly don’t get it. Supervisors can’t talk this way to their subordinates and if they do, maybe they should be fired? It’s definitely not professional. I don’t mean the coaches should coddle their players, but surely they shouldn’t verbally abuse them.

Not all coaches are like this, by any means, but should ANY behavior like this be tolerated?? I would think respect would go much further, but that’s just me. And what about the student/player? What can they do about a teacher, or coach, who verbally abuses them? If it’s a coach situation, the player might get benched if they speak up. A no-win situation, potentially. What are your thoughts? What advice would you offer up?

Not ok? That’s ok!

Found this recently and thought it was perfect! I see so many people trying to portray a happy, unencumbered life. Makes me sad, because we all know life is seldom perfect and it I think those people are hiding from the truth. It’s ok to not be ok. It really is. Part of what’s wrong with the world today is the expectation to handle all that’s dealt to you with a smile on your face. It’s ok to show real doubt, sadness, or just plain unhappiness. We’re all human. Are you struggling with trying to maintain an “image”?

Life is often painful, but there’s always a glimmer of hope

I’m sorry I’ve been AWOL for a little while, but I’m back and in a better mental and physical place. This last week has held moments of physical pain and times of uncertainty with a loved one’s medical issues, but thankfully, all is well…for now. I’m holding on to the silver linings and working hard to find the positives in life.

What do you do to overcome negativities? To conquer uncertainties? To feel good when life challenges you?

Suicidal thoughts?

I have experienced family member’s suicides and I’m torn with my responses. On one hand, I’m mad. How DARE they leave their loved ones with so much pain? On the other hand, I feel relief that they are no longer in pain, suffering with the mental anguish of not wanting to live.

And of course, I’m left frustrated that it’s such a senseless death. So many unanswered questions…Was it avoidable? Could I have helped more? Did they really believe death was the ONLY answer? Why didn’t I see the signs?

It’s so final. Your last bad decision doesn’t define you.

Then I ask myself when I became God? Who am I to decide when someone should or shouldn’t die? The survivors hurt so much, but the person who commited suicide just couldn’t live with the pain anymore. Which person should experience the pain? Is it selfish to say YOU live with the pain. Instead of me mourning your loss?

If you’re having suicidal thoughts, there is help. 1-800-273-8255 if you’re in the States. Talk to me. I’m here for you…